The Hero

I going to thwart alien invasion

And protect humanity

From aggressive other beings

From throughout the galaxy





I’ll zap them with my raygun        

And reverse their gravity

And as they begin to levitate

I’ll go home for my tea





But if they attempt to thwart me

With their strange technology

Try to mind control me with

Off world psychology





I’ll show them I’m impervious

Demand an apology

Then I’ll return them to their surface

And un-reverse their gravity





And then I’ll ask a favour

As I hope they can help me

Find a way to rescue humans

From humanity

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Superheroes

She’s going to go to collage

To learn how to superhero

So she can thwart alien invaders who

Our earth want to overthrow





He’s going to go to collage

To learn how to superhero

So he can leap tall buildings

(When he overcomes his vertigo)





And when they get to collage                                                                      

They’ll learn how their alter ego

Mild mannered in thick rimmed glasses

Can mingle incognito





Until a threat is detected

Then the student heroes

Will phone-booth transform into action

And vanquish our earths superfoes





They’re going to go to collage

To learn how to superhero

They’ll both be disappointed

Heroics they’ll have to forgo





As the earths only threat are its people

We will see our earth destroyed

From indifference they cannot save us

The superheroes will be unemployed

Superman

Facing an extinction threat

In a failing jumbo jet

Your crash and burn

Future set

That’s a job for Superman





Atomic bomb

Strapped to a bench

Metropolis wide

Blaze to quench

That’s a job for

Übermensch





He can save

Tree bound cats

Extinguish fires

In chemical vats

Do it all with some éclat

He is good at

Jobs like that





He’s the one

We can rely on

The alloyed man

Of carboned iron

Who will watch

Despondently

As we commence our world war three

Then four

Then five

He will survive

Will we

Or are we kryptonite

For his empathy