Work-life unbalanced

A meeting via phone

Pixelated colleagues

Bedroomed and alone

No one to make the coffee

No one to buy the cakes

No one to say good morning to

No water cooler breaks

No one will say ‘how are you’

No one will interrupt

No office politician

Ill-advised and abrupt

No one to shoulder cry with

No one to share a smile

No one to spend the day with

This is the new lifestyle   

Of pixelated people

Who work-life postpone

Their work and life unbalanced

Bedroomed and alone

Get Fit Ambition

Fortified with vitamins

A shaken protein shake

I’m off to pump some gym iron

And better body make

I’ve got get fit ambition

I’ve got shed weight desire

I know there’ll be a battle so it’s

A calorie ceasefire

For me

There’ll be no cakes and biscuits

No red wine dinner treat

As I’ve added X to my XL

I yearn to be petite 

I want to see my tummy shrink

And upper arm guns grow

As I said bye-bye to biceps

Many years ago so

I’m off to pump some gym iron

To start a bench-pressed quest

To be a dumbbell campanologist

To excess weight divest

I’m filled with motivation

And a chocolate topped éclair

As the thought of pumping gym iron

I feel cannot compare

With five a day confectionary

And the fruits of bottled grape

So I’ll delay my gym desire

And protein shake forsake

Why bother lifting iron

When I can lift patisserie

So I’ll resist gym join ambition

And instead, join a bakery

That Man in the Pub

You’ve seen that look before

The cheap brown suit

The Windsor knotted tie tied tight

The brothel crept boot

He’s the funniest man there ever was

The funniest there will ever be

His mirth fuelled words supress all smiles

And lack sincerity

So you avoid his eyes

You know it’s wise

He’s not your bestie mate

You don’t dare to glance

At the funniest man

Or to you he’ll gravitate, too late

To turn away

So prepare to hear

His endless repartee

His underlined unpunchlined

Forced hilarity

And though you want to be alone

You’ll buy him his next drink

Share a pub door smoke with him

You know you live in sync 

With the funniest man

In the cheap brown suit

And Windsor knotted tie

The master of vulgarity

The pub bar butterfly

He’s everything you don’t want to be he’s

That man in the pub

And soon you’ll be another

Welcome to the club

Comfort Zone

It’s time to go outside my comfort zone  

And try something comfort unzoned

Something I wouldn’t normally attempt

That I comfort outside zone postponed

Something out of my ordinary

Involving something new

An experience I wouldn’t normally try

A comfort zone breakthrough

I’ve made a list of perhapses

Included a few maybe’s

The list is quite extensive

It fills me with comfort unease

As I’m happy not comfort zone straining

And really cannot see why

I should attempt to step over the border

And bid my comfort zone goodbye

So I’ve decided I’m going to stay put

As making a list has shown

That just thinking about going outside

Was outside my comfort zone