The Helpdesk

It cannot make a cup of tea

Paint the ceiling

Cat de-flea

Predict the weather

Iron the dog

Throw a fire

On the log

TV magnetic

Flux degauss  

Brick by brick

Help me move house

It’s nothing more than just a desk

Mundane and dull

Un-Kafkaesque

Or so I thought

When I joined the queue





I’m still there

Holiday

I want to get away from it all

Have a relaxing holiday

Pass a port with my passport

Find somewhere warm to stay





Somewhere with a sandy beech

A warm inviting sea

Somewhere I can sun myself

Absorb vitamin D





I want to get away from it all

From it all wants away from me

I got a postcard from it all

It’s on holiday by the sea





I’m having a lovely time, it wrote

I don’t wish that you were here

I’m sorry but it has to be said

As you made it perfectly clear





You want to get away from me

So I got away from you

I’m never ever coming back

This is a permanent adieu





How rude, I thought, but it had a point

I couldn’t disagree

I just wish I could join my got away

And get away from me